Saturday 3 August 2013

Madame Rosario the Mystic Part 2



      With all the rushing around, arranging everything for the fete, I had forgotten it was a Friday night when Marco popped his Roman face around the kitchen door. Marco is the wine Merchant, who as we have found out likes a bit of slap and tickle, less of the tickle and more of slaps. Marco looked Italian, his Black hair to his Roman nose, his designer clothes and brown eyes that undress you. His temper has always let him down and his lack of keeping and being loyal to a steady boyfriend. The last boyfriend had been Bruce and we all know that little story (Rosario Private Dick). So I was quite taken back to see him.

"Marco darling, is it 10pm already, we have been so busy organising the Madame Rosario’s tent."

"It's actually 10.30pm Dizzy, I thought you might like to try this South African wine and tell me what you think tomorrow." Marco placed the bottle on the breakfast bar and started shuffling like he wanted to hang around.

 "Blurt it out, come on remember everyone has seen your U Tube debut, so nothing shocks me." I open the bottle and pick two glasses, then pouring the South African wine Marco had just brought.

"Sit, what's on your mind Marco?"

"It's Rosario" Marco said quiet nervously.

"What has that vermin been up to now?" Taking a gulp of the wine, I can never tell if its good or bad wine, it never hangs about long enough when I chuck liquid down my throat. 

"Well, when I was coming up here with your normal order, I passed the grounds, where the fete is going to be tomorrow and Rosario was there."

"Nothing I don't already know, she left here muttering something about checking on her jam and going to sort Mrs. West out for good."

"No, it was what she was doing." Marco looked quite alarmed.
By this time I was moist thinking what that little rodent was up.

"Spit it out you slapping freak, I'm ageing fast." Pouring another glass and swigging it right back.

"Rosario was walking around the edge of the grounds backwards, carrying a dead chicken under one arm and a wooden doll in her other hand. She was chanting something but could not catch it."


"Don't worry honey she is doing her voodoo rubbish again, only get worried if you catch her on your Birthday at dawn, naked in a field with a newly slaughtered chicken under her arm, running around chanting your name. By sunset you will be dead, this wine is lovely, put a couple of cases on the order for next week."

"She really does scare me Dizzy." Marco looked at me with his big brown eyes.

"Enough about the walking dead, now tell me, did you ever find out who put the U Tube video up?" I know what you are thinking but please the slapping freak is right in front of me, I had to ask.

"No, but I am so glad my 'friend' was not found, but we have stopped our fun for a bit." Marco was starting to open up.

"I only looked at it as a shocked and concerned friend, it was just a shame you and Bruce broke up. Your 'friend' must be quite important for you to keep his identity from anyone. I will tell you this Marco, never mess with married men it always ends in tears. Have you ever meet a bisexual guy who cheats on his live in boyfriend with a girl. It’s always the bisexual guy cheats on his girlfriend with another guy. They never leave their wives."

"I know Dizzy, I want happiness but just can't help myself, quite enjoy all the running around, secret meetings, married men are hot."

"How many do you have Marco?" I look at him in horror, plus wouldn't it be fun tracking Marco to find out who it is.

"6, not counting my special 'friend', it was 9 last year but 2 moved away." Marco said proudly.

"Shame the other 2 left you could have got them all together and had one hell of a slapping party." Trying not to look gob smacked 7 married men running around the town with Marco, this place is getting worse. I pray to the Great lesbian God in the sky one of them is Mrs. West’s husband.

"They are not all into CP, only my friend bi..." Marco stopped short of spilling the beans, but that didn't matter we all knew who it was anyway.

Rosario bursts through the back door holding a dead chicken and a wooden doll that looks just like Mrs. West.

"My path is now clear for me to win the 'Jam of the Year' look out bigot, I'm coming to get you." Rosario slapped the dead chicken right on the breakfast bar on a chopping board in front of Marc, who stands up and announces.

"I'm off, see you tomorrow Dizzy and good luck Rosario." Marco was now near the back door, Rosario looks up to him, grabs a large knife and takes the head of the chicken off in one chop.

"I don't need luck freak, Hahahaha" Marco was out the back door and down my back passage even before she started to laugh.

"Get a fucking grip Medusa, it's only a fete, and we both know you will win the fastest pole climber but the 'Jam of the Year' will be hard even for me to help you on that."

"Just make sure they taste Mrs. West's jam first then make sure you give them 5 minutes before tasting the other 4 jams making mine the last." Her head was down and she was plucking that bird faster than a machine could do.

 "What are you up to?" I was really puzzled.

"Just do as I say drunk poof and it will come clear in the tent." Now she had her hand right up the bird and at that point I said goodnight and left her to it.

To be continued..........

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